oh shit you's guys, CoCo's in TOWN!!

dear internet:

several months ago, i rented a hotel room, so i could get an immense amount of work done and sort of escape. it happens. the second day, i was getting ready to check out and chris calls the room. "conan o brien is playing the music hall, they just announced it and tickets are on sale". I was like SHIT, i'm sure they are gone already. i got online, pulled up two tickets, but figured i might be able to get better ones by calling. i called and the phones were SOLD OUT, so i nabbed the floor seats online.

the days go by and it doesn't really hit me that conesie is going to be here, in the same city as me, shit. i've been in love with this man since i was 12. In 6th grade i started staying up late and watching LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN O'BRIEN. at least three times my parents caught me staying up way past my bedtime, hiding under the covers, pretending to be asleep, yet my room was illuminated by the soft glow coming from my tv screen. every night was like an obsticale course that i had to get through in order to watch conan and andy. sometimes, i would just set my vcr and watch it the next day, still it was the crack i couldn't live without.

each night a new hilarity would be in store. to be fair i would watch leno as well, and always though to myself "well this guys alright, but he's no conan and david letterman is old and weird." it was always conan and andy. they were my friends after hours. i watched the couches, desk, and background decor change every few years. conan's hair getting going from taller, to shorter, to tangerine, to strawberry blonde. andy's warm cheeks and golden 1920's doll hair always made me want to eat over sized lollipops with him. i really loved these guys. i wrote to both of them in 8th grade, also requesting autographs. out of all the letters and requests in sent, the only ones i got back were from conan, andy, and jim carrey. conan's and jim's were auto pens, which meant preprinted. andy however, personalized mine, it even says "to heather anne".

late night was responsible for creating some of my favorite characters ever. triumph the insult comic dog has always been a staple in dvd's to show my friends. and what happened to robot on the toilet? man, so good. walker texas ranger leaver, shit, so GOOD! you know you love it. o'briens legs flailing around, doing walks like john cleese. it has just been perfect. naturally i've developed huge crushes on conan and andy, and that's to be expected, but not really. funny is a large part of my attraction to men and these two are a dynamic duo.

it was announced conan would take over the tonight show and i had my reservations, thinking conan would have to tame down the show, but i was still very excited for him. he's deserved it. then all the hullabaloo began and conan got kicked out, handing the tonight show back to leno. nbc really fucked up, but maybe it's for the best. time will tell. during all of the drama, this was placed up at my work. it's the first time i took time to make something out of construction paper at work. it drew many comments from customers on board with co-co or routing for leno, either way, i made the statement for the dobie. YES!!



yup, i really love conan. anyone will tell you.
don't get me wrong, i have much love for andy as well. that man had two genius tv shows that no one watched. it's a dumb world with dumb people!! brilliant but canceled.

well, friday was the day.
the day that conan comes to austin.
we got there, our seats not being nearly as close as they looked on the map. still not bad. the show was great, a true variety show, a can safely say i've never seen a show quite like. they did throw back to late night skits, sang songs, conan played many songs, which he loves doing, and this was a perfect platform for it. we are waiting for an album, o'brien!! all good things, but really who cares about the show? lets get to the good stuff.

after the shows, i suddenly was sinking. i was so sad. i was asked by an employee if i needed medical attentions as security ass wipes asked us to leave. i hate that. we are all going to fucking leave, fat guy, we are just not in a hurry to wait in a line to exit. yeesh. chris was a great boyfriend asking me what was wrong, but i was too embarrassed to tell him the real issue.

it was over.

that was it.

my one on one conan experience.

the man i've laughed at and with. the man i've learned from. the man i've admired and dreamt about. the single most entertaining presence through the largest part of my life so far, has finished his show and was off the the next city.

not to mention i'm also a celeb whore. i love meeting celebrities. i love touching
them, as most of them aren't even real to me sometimes. it breaks that barrier, but really i'm just a fan girl. a nerd. and what's wrong with that?

i take my time leaving the austin music hall, staring at the merch, finally we walk out and i head towards the bridge even though chris wants to go the other way. i know that he's not going to want to wait around to see conan, but it's obvious to him i'm super sad that i know i'm never going to see him again. chris assured me, you'll see him again, just like bill murray. i was negative.

we saw a crowd waiting for him, quite large. as we chose to walk away and it killed me inside, we heard the crowd being to scream and cheer. chris said, let's go, he took off running back towards the crowd, edging me on, even though it was pissing me off, i know he meant well and wanted me to get some sort of memorable moment.

conan was signing things, he PR duche, told him he couldn't take photos with anyone, and then conan said, "alright guys, i gotta run, i gotta go to tulsa". at that point, after chris nudging me and saying "get in there" over and over again, trying to get me to have him sign a fucking 711 receipt and shit, i said, fuck it, "i got BOOBS!"

i ducked under two people, pushed one out of the way, grabbed conans toned bicep through his navy blue post show izod shirt and said "please". the tall one turned around to face me and look down at my chest, i held a sharpie to him and said "please" again.
he said "what? really?" "Yes, please" "where?" he asked. i replied with "anywhere you want!" he took the slightest second pause and then, opened his mouth wide, i looked off, beaming into his hair and he let out a great yell while signing across my pale heaving chest. he then darted into his white transport van and was off.

i could barely breathe. i shook and all i could think was "whiskey, cigarette".
must have whiskey, cigarette. chris couldn't have been happy for me. which is the
kind of boyfriend i need. true nerd support. photos were taken and that's the memory.
plus conan touched me with his pen.

everyone's been pushes me to get it tattooed, but that's a no go. i can't have one THERE, plus conan is not in support of people tattooing his signature.

.... there was something in the air that night ...
..the stars were bright..
CONANDO